They'll give any monkey a blogspace

[Victor Synn]

Every so often I like to Google search the band's name and see what I come up with. Usually, I'll get some random write-ups of the band amongst other sites for hair salons, lice control shampoo, or tranny porn (Yes, you read correctly...tranny porn. I guess Phil's been up to his old tricks again.) Anyway, one site caught my eye and I decided to read it. It happened to be a blog site for someone named Ben Kleban from 2005. I guess this loser takes pleasure in trying to be edgy or controversial in his blogs. He claims to eat popcorn during car wrecks and other cliched bullshit. Anyhow, he posted a nice write-up about HF1, but more specifically, me. I wasn't going to say anything about this blog post, but I'm in a piss poor mood at the moment and I figure why the hell not? Here is his post:


You are not Winger.
God I love ripping of freaks. Actually I just enjoy being an all around pretentious asshole. My two favorite past times are taking candy from little kids and pissing on peoples graves. A fun saturday night if you ask me. So tonite I was searching through the common place for freaks and geeks and other factions of people who's high school years were spent listening to shitty industrial rock a while sniffing paint thinner, MySpace. God I fucking hate myspace. Anyway so randomly looking at the freaks and I found the western pennsylvaia ring of Glam Rock/80's Hair band lovers. Yes! People to who's lives suck so bad they have to relive sucking down doubie after doubie in their '85 Camaro! I love this shit. Come on this guys is in the band "Hair Force One" Jesus christ, this is too fucking real for me no to go off on.Of all the lame shit on the internet, i have to find the worst train wreck out their. Of course I had to read on. I mean we have already established my dementia. The guy is named Victor. Strike one. Biggest fucking hair I ever saw. Strike two. The extreme list of shitty 80's hair bands, including Krokus, Im not even going to waist me time, onto the list of friends. MORE FUCKING BIG HAIR!!! Yes! It must be christmas. More people with big WMV files coded to their webpages of poision. Even I want to hear "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" at this point. High Tops, Mullets, Joan Jett, this shit keeps coming. So you know how a few hours after a car wreck they start cleaning up, you know the blood and cars and shit, its usually threw my second bag of popcorn. Well I started to run out of these nut jobs, so I had to move on. Whats a step above pot head 80's junkies . . . . Crack Whores! Yes! More fucking River Pheonix loving Heroin junkies, I love this shit even more. I can't go on I need to go kill a few puppies to get myself back on the right track of thinking. I'll leave you with some links:

When good hair for wrong : profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=1974391&Mytoken=CFE3C0A3-1471-149B-72925CA7683B60B929781713

Cocain is a Hell of a drug :
viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=viewImage&friendID=4791974&imageID=139239356&Mytoken=E61B3944-F47E-49B3-9A54BDFF7A9C2B1B1491174984



30 people this month fucking hate quiot riot


What can you say about this shit other than thanks for the free publicity. You don't have to like me or HF1, but here's one thing anyone that has something to say about us has to remember...Unless you do what we do week in and week out, you have no right whatsoever to say anything. It takes a special type of person to be a musician. And even more so to be one that also does the look of the era they cover. Funny thing is, out of the X amount of people that may have looked at that post, probably half came to see us out of curiosity and left as fans. So if this Ben was trying to be some kind of a buzzkill, he failed at it. I love the fact that someone has to be brave on a blog. If you saw this guy's pics, you'd know he has no right to say anything about how someone looks. If a large mouth bass and a pepperoni pizza fucked, this guy would pop out in 9 months.

In closing, I'll say this:
Don't act tough to impress your friends. If you have to tell people you kill puppies and shit like that, you aren't anywhere near tough or intimidating. If you kill the puppies, I'm the one that would cook and eat them. We are as good as we are because we do everything that has to do with the era of music we cover. If you think you can do better, come give it a shot. I'll gladly hand you the mic and let you embarrass yourself for a few minutes. If not, keep your mouth shut and let the big boys play.

[Starr]

Jealousy will do that to a person.

[Roman Fyngerz]

Yeah... chalk it up to "free publicity". Love us or hate us (and MOST love us), we are VERY good at what we do.

[Candy Coxx]

I know this is an old post..but whatever.. :-P

I can honestly say that I was once of those people that didn't want to give certain bands a go just because I thought it was crap.. You definitely can not judge one by appearance. I wouldn't listen to half of the music I listen to today if it wasn't for Nikki. I have learned so much about music by being with him. I had an older brother so I grew up listening to the 80s music and absolutely love it. Nikki and I still don't see eye to eye on all the music but who does really? When I found out he was joining HF1 I was actually sort of excited. I love the music that all of you play and him joining another great group was thrilling. All of you are very talented. Some people are talentless and have no lives and thats when those poor blogs come out. Someday that monkey raping little man will get a life and realize that he is a nobody.

Keep rocking guys!!

[Victor Synn]

It's cool. The posts might be old, but the points are still valid. There are plenty of haters out there that have no right to hate on anyone that plays in a band, regardless of what style they play. As musicians, we all have that part of us that likes the competition, but in the end, the fans will decide who is good and who isn't.